The Lost Tooth

She opened her bleary eyes, when the cat, all seven pounds of squirming flesh, climbed onto her belly. Squinting into the sunlight streaming in from the open window, she discovered that she was now the weary possessor of a pounding headache, and at some point, had managed to lose both a tooth and a spouse….

Black Magic

Of course, men can be witches.  At least, old desperate men like me can.  Especially, if you’ve been ridiculed all your life for your supposedly unnatural interest in jewelry and heels. So when supermodel Vera Brixtom decided to OD alone in her car, a few kilometers away from the party district of Ziro, it was…

Welcome to my Pity Party

Do you understand disgust?  Self-disgust? Then welcome.  Welcome to Amel’s pity party. No, no…we aren’t hiding under fake names.  This is her party.  Where she has the stage to spit ball and embarass herself.  Relieve herself in public.  Because why not?  Its a free space.  You get to flood it with baby pictures and travel…

Why that Bimbo Smart

Bimbo is someone I have often seen at many work places.  Of course, she’s Indian, probably Punjabi, I dunno, long black locks of hair, luscious lips, and white skin, the works.  The kind of girl who is pretty because she firmly believes it and takes enough selfies to prove it.  Obviously, she’s no friend of…

Why Hell is an Alumni Group

So some lame-ass in my college class of 2004 has suddenly decided that it would be an awesome idea to find the phone numbers of 57 other class mates (two dead, may their souls rest in peace away from all social media) and form a WhatsApp group. The poor dear has convinced some of his…

Mr. Skeleton in the Closet

I opened my closet, expecting nothing surprising.  Just the same set of mismatched, undersized clothes I picked up hoping I’d grow thin some day without dieting or exercising. What I did not expect, was an anorexic version of a human being.   Well, not exactly anorexic, as starved.  Not actually starved, as dead.  And boney. …

Twenty-Five is a very attractive age

Twenty-five is a very attractive age. Bangalore Society is full of women, who of their own free choice, remained twenty-five for years. Take me for instance. I have been twenty-five ever since I arrived at the age of thirty, which was many years ago now. Frankly, this whole practice of age and its every increasing…

Samosa Fairy

Now my mother is always of the opinion, that when I have an impending time crunching situation before me, a bus to catch, a road to cross, a deadline to miss, I have a tendency to pretend that I am in one of those badly made, over-dramatic movies, where everything is in slow motion right…

Yakshi (Part 1 of 2)

“I don’t really get your premise.  If they were just female vampires, why do your yakshis target just handsome virgin boys. Why not gorge on anyone at all,” said Neha “In fact I could gladly recommend a pervert or two as a midnight snack for the ladies.” “Sexual urges, machi,” replied Nair, the self-appointed expert…

What Women Want….on their birthdays

The truth of the matter is that I don’t know what I want for my birthday. The truth of the matter is that I want you to find it out. Dip into my subconscious, read it like a book, and figure it out for me.  Until you do that, I’m going to pretend I actually…