The Crucification of Jack Sparrow

It was when Jack found his hands and legs tied unceremoniously to the gigantic cross, crumbling under its damned weight, sweating in the harsh June sun, that he realized something. He was in trouble, big time. The sentry nearby threw the whip again his sweating body. “Ok, Ok. I’m hoisting up. It ain’t gonna happen…

(Mallu) Bachelors in Bangalore

Nair wasn’t happy that particular day. Today was Vishu, the traditional Kerala new year, and had he been at his home in Kerala today, with his dear mother, he would have been awakened early in the morning and taken to the Puja⁠ room, his eyes gently shut by his mother’s loving hands. The aroma of…

The Trials of a Rich Housewife

There are no poor in Manampally…..at least not the type that was poor enough to work for a living. Or perhaps they did not subscribe to the principal of working for a living. Their principal argument against this fundamental expectation was the presence of the umpteen well-to-do gulf returnees in the land, all of who…

The Public Rape of Salman Khan, and related rape humor

Let me begin with another inappropriate quote from George Carlin “People say you can’t joke about rape.  That rape is not funny.  I say, fuck you….I think it’s hilarious. I can prove it. Picture Porky Pig raping Daisy duck. See? And I know what men are gonna say…Daisy was asking for it.  She was coming…

My Envy – In All Honesty

You know what I can’t stand? Insufferable prick-writers who are probably describing say….an action scene…the two-faced son-of-a-gun who raped your wife and stole your life’s belongings while pretending to be your best friend is on the loose, and you chase him on one of those fancy-named sports cars, with a nine-inch revolver and a backup…

Transcendence for the Nympho

Warning:  Explicit Content As George Carlin would say, what’s with all these writers. Could you stop describing the damn clouds and get to the fucking. But it is kinda breezy. In a wistful way. The leaves gently quivering.   And really there is no fucking. There is actually a fucking ban. So its more like….making out…

Idiot’s Guide to Transcendence

Hrithika sat cross-legged under the Bodhi tree. Well, at least as much as her leg would cross itself. Lakshmi, the facilitator for the day, not only crossed her bare legs as the wind ruffled her hair, but had a strange boneless quality to it, as if they could collapse into multiple folds if there was…

Just Another Terrible Love Story

Let me tell you a story about love. The thing about love is that the lesser number of times you’ve had it, the more of an expert you seem to be. I don’t agree to this. Now, I should be the one to tell this story, cos I’ve fallen in and out of love so…

Satan in a Pickle

Luc slithered into the garden of Eden, and waited for the length of his body to coil itself behind a bush.   Even from the behind the cover of the dense bushes she was beautiful. Perhaps this would be the last time. The last time he ever saw her. Did he have the courage for it?…

Fake ‘I love you’s

“What’s with this I love you business yaar. I’m done with it.   You say it when you pick up the phone, you say it when you slam the phone. And while we are at it, what’s with these phone conversations. I can’t take those anymore, either. Why must we talk on the phone everyday. I…